Known-believer

And it occurred to me. For a long time, I used to wonder about this. But, I guess I have figured it out now.

Most people in this world can either be classified as believers or non-believers. There are those that believe in the existence of a super natural force - call it God, fate, luck or anything else. These people believe that this force would take care of them - to guide, nurture and protect them in life. Then, there are those who can be called non-believers. They dont believe in any such external force. They make their own fate. They create their own destiny. Anything good or bad that happens to them is a result of their own actions.

For a long time, I have been wondering which group I fall into. And then, I realized that there is a third group. And that is what I come under. Because of certain previous instances, which can only be classified as miracles, I accept the unverifiable gospel that God or some other such entity exists, and this entity plays a governing role. But then, here is the twist in my belief. Although I believe in the existence of God, I dont have faith in him. I believe that God exists, but I dont feel that he is on my side. And I dont think that he does a good job of ensuring justice.

I know there would be those that would say that all that happens does so for a good cause. But, considering all that happens in this world - how innocent people lose their lives, how miscreants flee away after imposing atrocities on people and so on, one wouldnt do wrong to acknowledge that injustice prevails.

If God is so good as I hear the first group of people talk about, why does he do things or allow things to be done, that cause mayhem and cant be undone? I can only leave that as a rhetorical question for now.